I’m about three weeks into my second semester here in Paris, and I must admit that being able to call myself a student at the oldest university in Paris is a kind of magic that most people will never get to experience. Most people in the language world, especially in the French language world, know the prestige that comes along with the name of the Sorbonne. The Sorbonne is one of the top universities in all of France for the humanities, and it is known world-wide as well.
It snowed in Paris today, and as I was walking around the Latin Quarter to find a book for one of my literature classes and to head to the library at the university that I now attend (I switched to the Sorbonne for this semester), I couldn’t help but to be enchanted by the beauty of the quiet, chilled, and snow-filled air encompassing the historic buildings around me. It was magical. It was, dare I say it, romantic.
“Good, for the most part. It feels nice to be back in the sense that I feel like I still have a lot that I need to accomplish here, but I also feel like I’m having a slight existential crisis. like I feel like my life here isn’t real, like it’s just this bubble of a life that I live floating about away from the real world.” These were my exact words when a friend asked me how it felt to be back in Paris and jet lag was kicking my ass, (It’s still kicking my ass.) so 2am thoughts became real, real quick.
I also had someone ask me the following question while I was home in the States: “If you absolutely had to choose right now between living in the United States and living in Europe permanently forever, which would you choose? If money wasn’t an issue?” I cannot properly express to you the amount of anxiety that I experienced because of this question. Even though I said Europe, the truth is, I have no fucking clue. I really, truly don’t.
About new year’s eve, I only remember about half of it. I guess that’s what happens when you mix champagne and beer and have a little, tiny stick for a body. What I do remember though is having an amazing time hanging out with bestie, Sam, in good ole Shorewood, Wisconsin at this amazing craft beer bar, Draft and Vessel. I remember that I rang in the new year feeling like 2017 can go suck it because it probably ranked about number 2 or number 3 on my list of worst years ever.
2017 was a year of trials and frustrations, of half insane, sleepless nights, feeling stressed in general and feeling stressed about my half insane sleepless nights. Ever go crazy even more because you can see that you’re going crazy? Yeah, that was 2017 for me. I can say, however, that it ended with the most happiness I had felt all year.